Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
People in love make me want to vomit
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Terrible idea I love it
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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