he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
