Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
