physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
