I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
