Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize