Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
