You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
