No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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