There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize