I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
