We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
