apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
