are you still at the devil's house?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize
