bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
