Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
