I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
