Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
