all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
