what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
whose ass print is on the piano?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
