I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize