So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize