She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
