So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Randomize