The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
