So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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