Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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