No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
