Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
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