i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
