sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
