she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
3 2 1 whiskey
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
