Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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