Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
This is the high leading the old right now
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize