i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
