this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
