fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
