which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
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