Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
