I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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