If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
the day after is always just damage control
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
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