It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
