Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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