oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Randomize
