she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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