why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
