Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
