**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Randomize
