either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I would fuck him just for his dog
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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