He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
You pole danced in your parka.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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