Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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